I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Randomize
