Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(631): View more from New York

k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.

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(208): View more from Idaho

She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.

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(438): View more from Quebec

that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage

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(703): View more from Virginia

There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.

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27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Read it at the TFLN blog
(386): View more from Florida

I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.

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(301): View more from Maryland

did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15

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(601): View more from Mississippi

You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.

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(510): View more from California

I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.

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