i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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