no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
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