my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize