I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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