she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
