operation harelip BJ is a go
i just sent this text using only my big toe
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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