Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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