Texts From Last Night

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  (708): View more from Illinois

  You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women

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  (708): You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women http://tfl.nu/qt4m
  Replies (11) Good night (662) Bad night (1741)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?

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  (512): HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter? http://tfl.nu/9l91
  Replies (22) Good night (499) Bad night (2367)
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.

  (740): View more from Ohio

  Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight

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  (740): Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook. (740): Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight http://tfl.nu/qdoi
  Replies (23) Good night (728) Bad night (2870)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.

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  (904): He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him. http://tfl.nu/bmxc
  Replies (23) Good night (1126) Bad night (2856)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times

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  (330): I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times http://tfl.nu/rqlm
  Replies (19) Good night (4235) Bad night (1515)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out

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  (540): You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out http://tfl.nu/n0iw
  Replies (9) Good night (913) Bad night (3490)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.

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  (803): For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early. http://tfl.nu/j6ta
  Replies (3) Good night (1313) Bad night (1798)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.

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  (+44): If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong. http://tfl.nu/d9uh
  Replies (26) Good night (894) Bad night (6228)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.

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  (715): She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar. http://tfl.nu/6ko7
  Replies (2) Good night (1543) Bad night (885)
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.

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  (859): I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there. http://tfl.nu/fp94
  Replies (6) Good night (2053) Bad night (676)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...

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  (724): My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out... http://tfl.nu/jne9
  Replies (5) Good night (2668) Bad night (888)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.

  (847): View more from Illinois

  You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.

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  (847): That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy. (847): You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth. http://tfl.nu/gv40
  Replies (12) Good night (1910) Bad night (595)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones

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  (843): I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones http://tfl.nu/t1ex
  Replies (8) Good night (2068) Bad night (539)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.

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  (775): That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed. http://tfl.nu/y3pb
  Replies (9) Good night (256) Bad night (903)
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  (310): View more from California

  That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...

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  (310): That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire... http://tfl.nu/4kfh
  Replies (2) Good night (215) Bad night (403)

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