Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia . http://tfl.nu/fovz
  Replies (12) Good night (1496) Bad night (2292)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life. http://tfl.nu/rg12
  Replies (10) Good night (5235) Bad night (783)
• Favorite

  (862): View more from New Jersey

  this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (862): this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming http://tfl.nu/d5m0
  Replies (34) Good night (4081) Bad night (936)
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (774): I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books. http://tfl.nu/zd3b
  Replies (14) Good night (3947) Bad night (807)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. http://tfl.nu/ux00
  Replies (16) Good night (5712) Bad night (1360)
• Favorite

  (235): View more from

  I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (235): I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick. http://tfl.nu/7zv4
  Replies (55) Good night (2199) Bad night (6500)
• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (504): I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this. http://tfl.nu/j9b2
  Replies (10) Good night (3959) Bad night (1041)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner. http://tfl.nu/n8w7
  Replies (7) Good night (3416) Bad night (778)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy http://tfl.nu/uhwk
  Replies (13) Good night (3622) Bad night (1057)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M." http://tfl.nu/juhx
  Replies (8) Good night (6168) Bad night (788)
• Favorite

  (661): View more from California

  Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (661): Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry... http://tfl.nu/rns6
  Replies (6) Good night (916) Bad night (2232)
• Favorite

  (205): View more from Alabama

  Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (205): Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer http://tfl.nu/3cgt
  Replies (6) Good night (1392) Bad night (674)
• Favorite

  (662): View more from Mississippi

  There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (662): There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up. http://tfl.nu/6xku
  Replies (4) Good night (1852) Bad night (914)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans! http://tfl.nu/q5t9
  Replies (8) Good night (1670) Bad night (742)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke http://tfl.nu/zqlg
  Replies (2) Good night (550) Bad night (895)

Randomize