Is it normal to miss your booty call?
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Randomize
