So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
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