ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
