About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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