try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Randomize
