Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
i now understand why vodka
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
