Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
