I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize
