I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
even my farts smell like vagina
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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