You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?