I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Randomize
