Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
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