i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize