Will you blow on my dice?
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Randomize
