Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
And my parents said I crawled through the house
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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