You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Randomize
