hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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