dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
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is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
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I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
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