if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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