How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
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drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
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He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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