All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
