i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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