at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize