yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
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I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
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She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
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