She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Randomize
