ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
