Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize
