arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
