Texts From Last Night

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  (914): View more from New York

  so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water

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  (914): so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water http://tfl.nu/wymr
  Replies (3) Good night (750) Bad night (969)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.

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  (703): He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations. http://tfl.nu/6vv2
  Replies (32) Good night (880) Bad night (4063)
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  (516): View more from New York

  There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.

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  (516): There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office. http://tfl.nu/aczu
  Replies (16) Good night (3782) Bad night (665)
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  (931): View more from Tennessee

  so today I found out that she used to be a he....

  (1-931): View more from Tennessee

  are you gonna get a divorce?

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  (931): so today I found out that she used to be a he.... (1-931): are you gonna get a divorce? http://tfl.nu/5e03
  Replies (86) Good night (1091) Bad night (17188)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings

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  (330): just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings http://tfl.nu/xqge
  Replies (40) Good night (915) Bad night (7426)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  grab my backpack.....its in the fridge

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  (973): grab my backpack.....its in the fridge http://tfl.nu/prjt
  Replies (19) Good night (7973) Bad night (1053)
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  (514): View more from Quebec

  His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.

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  (514): His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn. http://tfl.nu/voym
  Replies (44) Good night (10467) Bad night (1885)
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  (718): View more from New York

  you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes

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  (718): you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes http://tfl.nu/46zk
  Replies (9) Good night (734) Bad night (2765)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.

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  (817): I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw. http://tfl.nu/upb5
  Replies (4) Good night (798) Bad night (1484)
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  (607): View more from New York

  You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick

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  (607): You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick http://tfl.nu/kpxh
  Replies (18) Good night (3165) Bad night (1000)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO

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  (973): DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO http://tfl.nu/pqah
  Replies (4) Good night (492) Bad night (807)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?

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  (817): I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help? http://tfl.nu/m7i3
  Replies (2) Good night (1004) Bad night (323)
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater

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  (952): College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater http://tfl.nu/orlm
  Replies (3) Good night (642) Bad night (345)
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus

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  (740): we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus http://tfl.nu/ulnv
  Replies (0) Good night (586) Bad night (265)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.

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  (770): He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped. http://tfl.nu/bmak
  Replies (1) Good night (452) Bad night (347)

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