I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Naked. naked and bneed help.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Randomize
