he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?