does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize