Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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