Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
God, you're like boner-b-gone
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
