is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
