We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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