I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I understand Curling. That high.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
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Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
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Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
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