Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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