Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
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