Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize