dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
