One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
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