This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
